Regal

 The rain outside kept me in.

Last week it was the heat.

Long poised strides 

in my element.

Refusing distraction 

from irrelevance. 

Where is my Fire?

Rejecting embellishment

waiving stability

&

emotional intelligence

shaving

non-functional

ornamental adornments...

another's desire.

take these back...

&

Where's my Crown?

Gold leaves

trims the reef.

Crown of Hearts

and Peace

Blue

 Middle Ocean 

Deep

the Still

the Calm

the Crashing Waves

at Dusk

the Quiet Clash

Clap & Splash

at Dawn

supplies my applause.

When you look at the stars

do they scream at you too?

Is whats said in reality

said in Dreams too?

15th floor

had the best view...

I wonder even now..

How is that true?

If only you knew.

Life's intent 

wasn't to confuse.

Still danger hangs,

dangles and swings,

clinging to things that 

your'e fully aware

you cant use.

It's not news

yet  & still 

you 

may be tempted 

to choose.

Neither is that new.

Neither is it just you.

I say keep those 

&

Where is my Robe?

Bare and undressed

Scarred and upset.

The halls are large and

un-swept.

The grass is high and unkempt.

It's 4 am I've not slept.

Indulging in unrest

Is it ok to be good

even without being your best?

Cant breathe out your nose

  with a knee on your neck.

Is it ok to speak

without showing respect?

no smoke no mirrors 

still I reflect...

Where's my Court?

I speak in closed circles 

to my Red Arrow Warriors and Chiefs.

Discuss and prescribe

where the walls are weak.

Reading songs, 

letters, 

proverbs

& prophecies

64 books

research and repeat.

Growth

People can change.

 Not everyone will believe in the fact that you are different. 

Some may even attempt dragging you backward or provoking you into negativity...

Why?

 Because it's they themselves 

who are stuck. 

KEEP GOING 

KEEP GROWING.

Don't fall for the Bullfrog!

Written by: Vannique

Illustration by: Alexander Keeton

I was recently told that : A bullfrog could be boiled alive and never attempt to jump out so long as the water began at room temperature.

Don't try this at home people! But let's give this a once over.

The frogs natural habitat has water. He's used to getting wet. For him, nothing unusual here. As the water rises slowly to 90° he acclimates. Then another 20° he acclimates. This acclimation continues all the way until the boiling point of 212° F. Now I'm no frog, (Resist the urge!) but I would think at some point it was too hot! But not for Jeremiah the Bullfrog.( I couldn't resist the urge!) Why did he stay? Jeremiah got desensitized to the escalation of his situation. And probably at one point thought to himself..."Mmm...cozy".

"Mmm Cozy" -Famous  Last Words

Now, I don't know if this is true or really just an old wives tale. However, here's one thing I do know : We humans can be just as dim to the severity and possible horrific outcomes when in a worsening situation. Somewhere in the scheme we accept what should be rejected.

The environment or whatever the situation we may be in, may be our norm. Going where we always go., doing what we've always done. Much like the frog in the water.

But is something amiss? Have you suddenly found yourself in your habits or situations accompanied by growing problems? Maybe you'd laid off of a healthy habit that you once had. Let's use the example of exercise. You skip a few days and say to yourself: "Mmmm Comfy". But we all know what happens: 3 days later you gain 50 lbs.

Let's up the stakes a few notches: You're in a longterm relationship, sent from Satan himself and rapidly declining. Somewhere in there you say to yourself: "Mmmm Comfy". You say: "I don't want to be single, I don't want to be solely responsible financially, where will I live? What about the car?" While you're thinking instead of moving, you may be approaching that "boiling point" of no return.

One more notch: A bad habit....pick one, any one, there's plenty to choose from: smoking, overdrinking, illicit drug use, losing your temper ect. These may have been apart of your habitat. They may be your norm. Chances are though you're seen different...even if it was just on TV. If left unrealized and unchecked how much "hot water" can any one of these  get you into.

Change is not "Mmmm Comfy"

Neither is any action you take to get to a higher ground. Jumping out the pot of boiling water, could land you on a hot stove (a difficult situation) yes, it's true. But it can also save your life. Self analysis (asking yourself the hard questions, or others and accepting the cold truth), coupled with making the choice, sticking to that choice and following through will bring positive change. 

The same person who shared this with me pointed out something  else its not enough to just take this thing away from yourself you also have to give yourself something positive in place of the bad habit or situation (even if not just to occupy your time and energy) is the start to change. *** This is not saying go find a person to waste time with that you have no real emotional attachment or possible future with!***

The Lesson In It All

Being complacent in an increasingly worsening situation can cost you your life. Not always in death, but maybe in quality. Seek growth...seek positive change. Don't fall for the bullfrog.

What's Your Problem; Idiom?!

By Vannique

"To every action there's a reaction."  "For every cause there is an effect." So let's say your kids are running through the house; this is the action or cause. While disobeying your rule :"No playing in the house cause you could break something you or me can't afford, fix or replace!" (This includes their necks. ) The kiddos ignore you; and the effect: Knock over your brand new, big screen, hi-def, wi-fi, smart TV with 3D capacity. (I think those exist?) Of course, you opted out of the insurance/replacement plan because of the manufacturers warranty, and when you purchased the TV 10 days ago they said you could add it in 30 days if you changed your mind. 

At the register you thought to yourself "I should probably buy this for an additional $300" then you remember "schools starting and I've got other things to buy we actually need.... Nothing is gonna happen to it" As you recall this fiduciary and mental transaction, during the slow motion run toward the television that has hit the floor in pieces faster than you ever thought possible, You remember something else you learned long ago that you wished you would've recalled at the register: Murphy's Law: Everything that can go wrong, will go wrong.

So what now?  What's your reaction?  Some of you are just in tears unable to function (Its almost football season! Now how are you gonna see the NY Giants get the 5th ring for 2015? GO BIG BLUE!!)  Some of you are thinking of how best to punish the children. Yet and still others of you are searching for a solution to the current situation.  You're in correct the crisis mode. Analyzing, prioritizing, rationalizing, reasoning. This group realizes the meaning of the idiom: No use of crying over spilled milk. 

Its not that the issue is small. . The point of the idiom, from Vanniques view, is to be solution oriented.  Clean up the milk before it soaks into your carpet and smells of mold and spoiled milk. (More Problems!) Before the milk sets too long on your hardwood floors and ruins the finish! (More Problems!) Before a visitor slips in the milk and sues your pants off.(More Problems!) See my point here? By not being solution oriented then the one problem just expands to more problems. Not fun, trust me.

I firmly believe to every problem there is a solution. Though the solution may not be ideal. Though it may be progressive rather than immediate, therefore requiring patience which for some is difficult to develop; still there is a solution. What if you've run into   something seeming to be a problem that appears to have not a solution. There could be a few reasons why.

1.) You've declined the solution:

You have an answer but it's not ideal. It does nothing for your fancy. It eats at your pride  (which can sometimes be treacherous.) Although it resolves the issue it's not to your liking. So you reject it.

2.)That you've not exhausted all your options or possibilities:

Sometimes we get a one track mind to our problem and only see one way out.  This way of thinking can be an impediment to a solution.  Thinking fast, or fast-tracking to your solution is fine, and sometimes necessary. But at times there is not an obvious solution or a fast track and you've got to think outside of the box. "There is more than one way to skin a cat"....or so I've been told.

Last but not least; a reason to be reckoned with.

3.) It's not a problem at all; it's  an Absolute:

Meaning there  is no "solution". Its the way it is, nothing can change it. I'm not quick to put things in the absolute category because it can create a defeatist attitude, becoming a catch-all to every problem that arises.  Its important to be able to recognize the difference. With that said though this must be said: Absolutes do exist. If there wasn't there would be no "Serenity Prayer." Even with absolutes there are still options: Accept it is one option. Or reject it completely.  This meaning dismiss it, never to be revisited again. I'm not quick to do the latter either. If you're quickly dismissive you may overlook something. 

I feel all problems and absolutes bare scrutiny and analysis, to decide which they are and which road to take.  Scrutiny and analysis mean nothing though, if it's not in a solution oriented manner. So when facing a problem remember these idioms:

"Every cause has and effect."

"For every action there is a reaction." 

"Don't cry over spilled milk."

"For every problem there is a solution."

"There's more than one way to skin a cat."

And

"Some things are absolute."

Traveler's Spirit

I've always had a travelers spirit. My first car was a 1991 Geo Metro light blue. I got it in 2002, I was 17 and silly. I took every and any opportunity to ditch school and drive it as far I possibly could. I would get to school before the first bell to fill the car with my close friends and we'd take off. I never took off with any direction to me that was half the fun... a full tank of gas and the radio was all that was needed. Most times my friends and I would end up in no mans land watching cows on a farm or something. But the adventure of it all thrilled me. Not knowing which turn I was going to take or where it would land me. I was fearless. I never felt lost, I had a good internal GPS and was confident in my ability to make it home always. My friends must've trusted me they came along for the ride and asked no questions.

Life's journey is similar in some ways. We never know what's gonna happen from day to day. Even if you have a destination, the road can have many detours.

Some detours can be taxing. Other ones tax free and worth it.

Sometimes our inner GPS in on point. We know exactly where we are headed and are certain we'll make it there. Other times you start out in one direction... Lose your place end up elsewhere and look for help to get back.

I'm not sure if being lost is even an actuality. I think of it more as a state of mind. A state of panic even, you destined on a place... You took wrong turns... Got distracted missed an exit.. Got turned around somehow.. But even if you don't know where you are, you know how you got there, chances are you can get back on track. Granted finding your way back to where you veered off could be harder than the veering itself. I feel though if you make it back on track the chances of you taking a wrong turn this time are slim. You're paying more attention now... you might veer off but you won't stray as far as you did before.. You may need to stop for rest, to regroup and replenish gas and rations... But then rubber meets the road again and your headed to your destination. You'll make it with confidence, fearlessness, being alert of your surroundings, not repeating wrong turns when you do get back on track.

By the time my friends and I would make it back to town. It always felt like we had only been gone for a few moments... Such is life. When you reach where you're supposed to be you want to be able to look at the journey and relish in the memories. Not cringe at the recounting. Don't get lost in that.  Rejoice in life's journey. Find beauty in everything. Treat life with the travelers spirit.

Vannique S.

Forgiveness

For who?

When your feelings are deeply hurt, how long does it take you to forgive? Or do you forgive at all? I will not pretend it’s an easy thing to do. What I will say is: its necessary.  Forgiving doesn’t make you stupid as some might feel. Think of it this way, daily God forgives us if we are truly repentant. There’s nothing stupid about The Almighty is there? Could you imagine if God held grudges? We would all be in trouble! It’s my belief that if he forgives the repentant on a daily basis, who are we not to forgive one another?

                I didn’t always feel this way. At one time it was hard to forgive, especially if I thought you “knew better.” I would think: “This person doesn’t deserve my forgiveness!” It was my grandmother who cleared it all up for me, she said “Forgiveness isn’t for the other person, it’s for you.” How right she was! I equated being forgiving with being weak.  I equated forgiving with allowing someone to harm me without doing the harm of hating them in return. Thinking about it though if someone could have hurt me that badly in the first place, are they truly the type to care how I feel about them in the next? Truly it’s hard to tell. Not every offense is intentional. Ever heard the phrase “If you knew better, you would do better”? Sadly, they may not know any better.  However, for those that were fully aware, who knew better, it’s not likely they cared to begin with. So by not forgiving them, that emotion you so badly want to plague them with, only plagues you.

                Another thing to consider is, just because you’ve forgiven someone, doesn’t mean, you are required or expected to repair or continue the relationship. It truly depends on how broken it is and if you are willing to risk your heart and energy trusting them once again. To you it may not be worth it. But the freedom that comes from not holding a grudge and not denying yourself the peace of forgiveness is priceless. It’s not for them, it’s for you. Forgive

Anger The Prime Impediment to Progress

Looking back on my mere 30 years I can, in all sincerity, say life is short. By no means am I old but if 30 happened in a flash, I’m certain the next 30 will be a blur. Even if I live to be 80 at the rate life passes I can blink and I’ll be 79. I look around and think where has the time gone? Then I do a self-appraisal: what have I done with my time? During my self-appraisal I seen the mistakes of my youth. Still, it wasn’t enough for me to understand that I made them, to know that they were irresponsible, and resolve not to repeat them. I wanted to know why I made them. So I hashed, rehashed, replayed, and came to the realization the problem. It was surprisingly simple, I was angry.

I say this and your thought may be: why did it take you 30 years to realize you were feeling this? Great question! This is not a simple emotion whose only recourse is to be displayed through violence, belligerence, difficulty, and dismay. Those are the moments when anger is in action, it’s peaked and can’t be concealed from your face or anyone else’s. I’m addressing today the undercurrent covered by the still waters stemming from those pivotal, life altering, and rude awakening moments in life that you thought, because you lived through, you had conquered. This type is most perilous. It’s a deceptive, pervasive and permeating spirit. It’s what I refer to as a secondary emotion. People usually experience this type only after they’ve had the experience of the initial emotion: embarrassment, hurt, humiliation, betrayal; to name just a few.

Possibly you endured the initial emotion (embarrassment, hurt, humiliation, betrayal) as a child and hadn’t had the opportunity, the experience or where-with-all to express properly, or even realize and vocalize what you felt to purge yourself of the poison that will soon turn rear its ugly head. Or perhaps your offender is someone you are ready and willing to forgive, have even done so, but haven’t properly addressed the situation. Now here comes resentment, the ugly 1^st cousin. So here we are feeling these initial emotions maybe even simultaneously. What do you think will come next if these emotions continue to fester? Anger.

The most damage is done to the inner person. Anyone who knows me well can tell you my outer spirit was fun, playful, and care-free. I was clueless to that fact that I was angry, to the fact I clung to and made decisions based on it.

Why cling on to it?

It's never intentional. If I had been aware of my position I would have had a starting place for healing. However, anger is very good at hiding in tolerated and all too common emotions of our day like: sarcasm, cynicism, pessimism, being judgmental, emotional detachment, including violence, risky behavior and irresponsibility.  Unfortunately, these have become a coping mechanism; a poor one but one nevertheless.

So what happens with this unchecked and unresolved anger in clever disguise? We pass it along to others, it’s infectious, highly contagious. Our mates, our children, our co-workers, our friends, all get a dose and the cycle continues. As if this isn’t enough, it’s been linked to other health problems: anxiety, heart attack, high blood pressure and the list goes on. In short if left to its devices it can shorten your life span and affect the quality of your relationships. Do you want to die angry and/or alone? Of course not!

I was fortunate enough to realize my predicament and speak to its derivation directly and resolve it. Everyone does not have that opportunity. If you do have the opportunity speak to who you may hold accountable, I encourage it. Realize, of course that as an adult it’s no one else’s responsibility to make your life pleasurable. So don’t expect that. If that’s simply not a possibility, write it down, talk to a loved one, talk to a professional. Just express it, constructively of course! Otherwise once that pressure has mounted you can expect a volcanic eruption. Your aim is to root out the prime impediment to personal progress. This will require an honest assessment of yourself, your past, your hand in the matter, if any.

• Am I angry?
• What’s the real cause for my anger?
• Who am I angry with? (Sometimes you can be angry with yourself.)
• Who should I really be angry with? (Again, it may be you.)

                Realize it is totally possible reach a desired location that you’ve never been too without using a map. Wouldn’t it take more time, resources and leave room for you to get lost without using the map? These questions are the road map to your destination of progress. Don’t misunderstand me a life free from anger is not a perfect one. We live in a system that is not conducive to perfection in our life. No human can change that. Sometimes we will be justifiably angry. Still acknowledging you are angry, identifying who you are angry with, having those hard conversations, unloading the internal baggage can free up the energy you will certainly need in this life to make it through the next 30 years without its negative consequences. 

Life is short don’t spend it angry.

Depression The Silent Slayer

Depression

The Silent Slayer

Ever had a gloomy day? Has that gloomy day lasted for a week? Do you feel like nothing will improve? Are you embarrassed to admit those things aloud? Join the club. In 2012 it was reported about 350 million, 5% of the earth’s population, suffer from depression. If you’re just now thinking to yourself “That’s not much compared to the 7 billion people living on earth.” You could say that but picture each person with the value of $1 in your bank account? Still sneezing at it? The value of 1 life is worth so much more.

Depression is a disease, like diabetes or cancer, it can infect healthy ways of living and erode even the very will to live. So how can we snap out of it? Here are a few tips that you can try or suggest to a loved one suffering from depression.

1.       Talk to someone

More people love you than you probably know, and are completely willing to do what they can to assist you. However, if you feel that’s not the truth then talk to a professional. They can help you figure out just where the depression stems from and offer you a fresh perspective. Is money an issue? There are some state funded agencies that have grants for those who can’t afford the type of treatment you may require. Check your local agencies to see what’s available.

2.       Take something to feel better

If medication prescribed by a doctor is not an option or not your thing (some side-effects being as undesirable as what it may be treating) then look for herbal remedies. Go to your local herbal store, a brick and mortar store like GNC or Whole Foods but if you just can’t get out of the door or out the bed take whatever medium you are using now to read this article and search online for reputable herbal companies, i.e. Nature’s Way, Irwin Naturals. Search for herbs to improve your mood and outlook (St. Johns Wart, Sunny Mood). Do your research though, some of these herbs don’t interact well with other mental health and wellness drugs so be informed.

3.       Take care of your body

Physical activity can do leaps and bounds for your mental health. It doesn’t have to be rigorous or strenuous. Small things a walk in the park, a jog around the block, go fishing. Just get active the more you are moving and taking in your surroundings the less apt you are to fixate and obsess over what’s not perfect in your life. A part of taking care of your health includes what you take in for food, so watch what you eat. Little by little make positive changes in your daily diet.

4.       Find an outlet

Not just any outlet! Healthy and responsible ones. What’s that thing you used to love to do and could do all day long?? Yeah! Do that even if it’s just for 5-10 minutes. OH no you don’t enjoy it anymore. It happens don’t fret. Try something new, language, reading materials, challenge your brain, paint, take pictures, write a poem, write a short story or how about learn a new dance! Lord knows there’s no shortage of those on You Tube. The point is don’t just sit idle. It’s very dangerous.

5.       Don’t underestimate the power of prayer

Sometimes 1-4 just can’t cut it because you can’t take that first step to even try. If you find yourself unable to, drop everything and have a conversation with the Creator. Not a memorized and recited prayer. Pour out the depths of your soul. Tell him your troubles if you can pinpoint them, If not ask him to read your heart and mind. Request that He impart His Holy Spirit and watch almost instantly you will have a measure of strength. What if you don’t know what eactly to say? There are literally hundreds of prayers in the Bible. Read it. Until you can find the words borrow theirs. After all He is the God of Comfort.

The Body and mind are a Temple. A Temple unkempt and uncared for eventually becomes a ruin. Don’t ruin your Temple. 

Living with Life

Okay so your life is not perfect. You don't have your dream job, you don't drive your dream car, have yet to close on your dream house, and your boyfriend/girlfriend relationship is getting stale as week old bread. We have all been there. Some of us live there. While it's true that we are not in control of every outcome in every situation, what can you control? You. If there is a passion you posses, do it. The scale will come eventually. The major focus is to hone in on your craft, passion, abilities and continue to make them great, greater than yesterday and the day before that. You are what you do,. Express yourself. Expression is what makes people unique. No-one can express themselves the way you do, It's the beauty of being individuals. Don't give up on your dreams, Just try your hand at improving your situation day to day. Focus more on maintaining what you do have rather than getting more to maintain. Remember, progress is a direction not a speed. And get rid of that stale relationship. Jokes people! Seriously though communication is key.

Persevere

Expressions and Dreams

I'm certain that I'm not the only one who thinks the monotony of day-to-day life is painstaking. Who would not want to wake up one day in a beautiful paradise? I'm talking across the world, where they've never dreamed they would be. I guess those of us who have done it aren't as enthusiastic about it. For those of us who haven't...you have no passport... and if you do have a passport.. not one stamp to speak of.  We, yes I'm including myself, are dying for it. We are literally dying to live! What joy is there in that? None. So what should we do?

Find a way to live our dreams to support our passions. Me myself I'm what I like to call an Expressionist. I love anything that I have to create music, poetry, painting, photography. I just love to express myself artistically. But all my life I've been told ,erroneously, that I need to keep my feet on the ground and my head out the clouds. While it's true you cannot daydream all day long, if you don't dream at all, think of it... you're not getting good sleep. Have you ever given up on the dream? That's what I call a nightmare. No matter how hard I try I can't give up on my dream of being a professional, meaning paid well to do it, Expressionist. The 9 a.m. to 5 p.m. job scene, or 5 a.m. to 1:30 p.m. in my case, is truly not for me. It dulls the spirit. It kills the inner creator but it sure does pay the bills. I want nothing more then to travel go places I've never been, be inspired by those places to create something new fresh and positive. For now I'll keep dreaming there has got to be a way because there is a will.