Regal

 The rain outside kept me in.

Last week it was the heat.

Long poised strides 

in my element.

Refusing distraction 

from irrelevance. 

Where is my Fire?

Rejecting embellishment

waiving stability

&

emotional intelligence

shaving

non-functional

ornamental adornments...

another's desire.

take these back...

&

Where's my Crown?

Gold leaves

trims the reef.

Crown of Hearts

and Peace

Blue

 Middle Ocean 

Deep

the Still

the Calm

the Crashing Waves

at Dusk

the Quiet Clash

Clap & Splash

at Dawn

supplies my applause.

When you look at the stars

do they scream at you too?

Is whats said in reality

said in Dreams too?

15th floor

had the best view...

I wonder even now..

How is that true?

If only you knew.

Life's intent 

wasn't to confuse.

Still danger hangs,

dangles and swings,

clinging to things that 

your'e fully aware

you cant use.

It's not news

yet  & still 

you 

may be tempted 

to choose.

Neither is that new.

Neither is it just you.

I say keep those 

&

Where is my Robe?

Bare and undressed

Scarred and upset.

The halls are large and

un-swept.

The grass is high and unkempt.

It's 4 am I've not slept.

Indulging in unrest

Is it ok to be good

even without being your best?

Cant breathe out your nose

  with a knee on your neck.

Is it ok to speak

without showing respect?

no smoke no mirrors 

still I reflect...

Where's my Court?

I speak in closed circles 

to my Red Arrow Warriors and Chiefs.

Discuss and prescribe

where the walls are weak.

Reading songs, 

letters, 

proverbs

& prophecies

64 books

research and repeat.

No Halle Berry

None of us are exempt from lifes challenges and discomforts. Our loved ones die, we get sick, our hearts get broken. These are life's inevitables. (Check your pulse of you haven't experienced at least 1 of the 3...seriously.)

You don't have much control in any of these situations. If  someone passes away, (unless you murdered them) its not in your control.  If you get ill, it's not in your control. If your heart is broken...again...not in your control.

To a measure you can prepare and take precautions to prevent these things. Those actions help but sometimes change nothing at all.
 
I'm in no way comparing the inevitables, they all have their own set of reactions. I want to focus on the reaction to heartbreak.

What a pain felt from heartbreak! Hell we almost feel sick or dying don't we? For some of us it takes time, therapy and lots of ice cream. Others of us are like a determined child...fall off, get right back up and try to ride again. Then, there are those of us who try to move on but internalize everything that happened and blame themselves.. I mean take on the burden of being the reason why something doesn't work out. I want to say to those types:
YOU AIN'T NO HALLE BERRY!
(stay with me)

She is a beautiful, accomplished, filthy stinking rich sex symbol. Unarguably,  one the best in her field.. WHOSE ON HUSBAND NUMBER 3. Now I don't know Halle personally but what I do know is I have yet to meet a man, or woman for that matter, who won't agree that from any angle...in any light... in any movie, from Boomerang to The Call, this woman is a phenomenal. ( It's an understatement really!) Even she is not immune to lifes inevitables. But what does that tell you? Think about it.
What more could one need than  to have the love of someone like her?

Apparently something. But, does  their needs indicate a deficiency in her? Does your exes behavior signify a deficit in you?

No not all. It may feel at first you are to blame. You may think "Had I done this more..or that more..cooked more...dressed better."
If you loved them best you could and you know it... then know this too...Nothing you have done or didn't do would have changed the outcome.

True love is blind.. doesn't care if you can cook..or dress snazzy.

My point is don't take the wrap for it. Dont internalize it. Not only is it not your fault but it's also out of your control. We all possess free will. You can't make someone love you.

People reject God daily... and He is perfect in all HIS ways.

The reality is someone who can lie to you, cheat on you, hurt you, may not love you.  And really do we expect them to? When it's clear those who have this type of appetite are usually insatiable... and suffering from a deep seated insecurity. They are champions at disguising this... And often get a sense of fulfillment from being desired, loved or even coveted.

Believe the almost unbelievable... ITS REALLY NOT YOU. IT'S THEM.

Also realize that it's part of life. Few and truly blessed are those who've never experienced a broken heart. But most are not immune... Not me, not you, none of us...
If it can happen to Halle Berry...it can happen to you...(No shade buuuuut) YOU AIN'T NO HALLE BERRY.

Deception. Who's at fault?

Deception: The act of causing to accept as true or valid what is false or invalid

Written by Vannique
Illustration by Alexander Keeton


In this world it's all to common to see deception in many facets. Deception in business practices, in relationships; romantic, platonic or otherwise.

So who can cause you to accept something as true although it's false? My answer is: only you, only me, only ourselves.

See in order to be deceived, we must first be aware of the truth. Otherwise, it's not deception. If we never knew the truth to begin with we cant exchange it for what's false. So deception begins only when we know our potential mates aren't the one, when we've seen with our own eyes that this person we consider a friend has 2 faces,  when we were warned about doing business with a company... and have made the conscious or subconscious choice to overlook or pardon any red flags because of our own desires.

Desire: Sometimes Deadly

Our desires are sometimes treacherous being controlled by the heart and all. When our heart really desires something (even when borne out of pure necessity and not foolish wants) whether it's love, true friendship, money.... whatever it may be.. our heart releases a scent of desperation that some are waiting to take advantage of because it quenches their inner desire.

Eve was Deceived

Let us think about Adam and Eve. Eve was deceived. Although she knew for a certainty that she was not to eat from the tree of knowledge, she did anyway. How do we know that she knew better? When questioned about Gods commands regarding it, she replied in harmony with them. She quoted the location of the tree, the name and the trees purpose, that she should not even touch it, and the result if she had. Fully aware of the situation she still allowed herself to be deceived. WHY? Satan told her she would be like God. He even said she would not die. At some point in time Satan noticed the desire in her to be God-like. Its also possible that Satan was counting on Eve having similar desires as him.  Eve allowed herself to trade in what she knew to be truth for a lie.

How unfortunate. We probably think to ourselves... "Not me I know the sky is blue no one could ever convince me its not." And you would be right! Only you could convince yourself to believe the lie.

Correct Me if I'm Wrong but the Color of that Flag is Red.

What should have been a red flag for her? Maybe the fact that a snake was speaking to her. I don't know about you but the moment my dog (who I love dearly) utters one intelligible word to me, I can assure you it won't be a Disney Movie moment.

What about the fact that Satans' information vastly differed from her original information. After all we are talking life and death here. If I receive differing information on a recipe I keep searching until I've reached a sound conclusion. Some recipes aren't forgiving.

So the combination of her hearts desire and ignoring of the red flags were a recipe for disaster.

Relationship Types

Business

Have you already had doubt's about it? Why? Have you noticed any red flags? Maybe the breaking of appointments, the changing of prices, the avoiding of answers, the poor customer service. What keeps you doing business? At this point you've seen all you need to see to know all you need to know. The choice is yours.

A Faux-friendship.

You share your personal details with them. They may even share some with you. You begin to trust this faux-friend only to later be fully aware that they are a foe. How did you miss it? Were they're red flags? Did you ever hear from them things that didn't sit well with you? Most likely so, but you know your definition of friend and what you've seen, despite the feigning of true friendship, is vastly different. The choice is yours.

Romantic Relationship?

We are all guilty of wanting to see the best in someone. Good people look for the good in others and while doing so overlook major flaws and red flags. Flaws and flags that they would readily notice were desire not playing a larger part then logic. Romantic matters of the heart are especially dangerous. Even when all is well, we get caught up in the rapture of it all, swept off our feet, float on air, on cloud nine... All these expressions denote losing touch with reality. If you lose touch with reality in an unhealthy relationship... how dangerous? So many pit-falls!

I feel it safe to say that losing touch with reality and deception, in any situation, are one in the same. Overlooking the known truths and red flags equals: Deception.

Doctors Orders: The Remedy

There is a quote from one of my favorite authors, Dr. Maya Angelou that cures the possibility of deception: "When someone shows you who they are, believe them the first time."

With that said it bears stating that no one human is perfect and at some point every person will fail to meet your self defined standards or expectations; even when they do love you or mean you no harm. Some may be unaware that they've sent up a red flag. Others purposely send red flags, speak cunningly, and play the game to see how far you will allow them to go.

The job of evaluating a situation in its entirety, comparing it to our set standards and known truths, acknowledging red flags and subtracting our hearts desire, belongs to each individual themselves. If your expecting a deceitful person to come correct your deceiving yourself.

What's Your Problem; Idiom?!

By Vannique

"To every action there's a reaction."  "For every cause there is an effect." So let's say your kids are running through the house; this is the action or cause. While disobeying your rule :"No playing in the house cause you could break something you or me can't afford, fix or replace!" (This includes their necks. ) The kiddos ignore you; and the effect: Knock over your brand new, big screen, hi-def, wi-fi, smart TV with 3D capacity. (I think those exist?) Of course, you opted out of the insurance/replacement plan because of the manufacturers warranty, and when you purchased the TV 10 days ago they said you could add it in 30 days if you changed your mind. 

At the register you thought to yourself "I should probably buy this for an additional $300" then you remember "schools starting and I've got other things to buy we actually need.... Nothing is gonna happen to it" As you recall this fiduciary and mental transaction, during the slow motion run toward the television that has hit the floor in pieces faster than you ever thought possible, You remember something else you learned long ago that you wished you would've recalled at the register: Murphy's Law: Everything that can go wrong, will go wrong.

So what now?  What's your reaction?  Some of you are just in tears unable to function (Its almost football season! Now how are you gonna see the NY Giants get the 5th ring for 2015? GO BIG BLUE!!)  Some of you are thinking of how best to punish the children. Yet and still others of you are searching for a solution to the current situation.  You're in correct the crisis mode. Analyzing, prioritizing, rationalizing, reasoning. This group realizes the meaning of the idiom: No use of crying over spilled milk. 

Its not that the issue is small. . The point of the idiom, from Vanniques view, is to be solution oriented.  Clean up the milk before it soaks into your carpet and smells of mold and spoiled milk. (More Problems!) Before the milk sets too long on your hardwood floors and ruins the finish! (More Problems!) Before a visitor slips in the milk and sues your pants off.(More Problems!) See my point here? By not being solution oriented then the one problem just expands to more problems. Not fun, trust me.

I firmly believe to every problem there is a solution. Though the solution may not be ideal. Though it may be progressive rather than immediate, therefore requiring patience which for some is difficult to develop; still there is a solution. What if you've run into   something seeming to be a problem that appears to have not a solution. There could be a few reasons why.

1.) You've declined the solution:

You have an answer but it's not ideal. It does nothing for your fancy. It eats at your pride  (which can sometimes be treacherous.) Although it resolves the issue it's not to your liking. So you reject it.

2.)That you've not exhausted all your options or possibilities:

Sometimes we get a one track mind to our problem and only see one way out.  This way of thinking can be an impediment to a solution.  Thinking fast, or fast-tracking to your solution is fine, and sometimes necessary. But at times there is not an obvious solution or a fast track and you've got to think outside of the box. "There is more than one way to skin a cat"....or so I've been told.

Last but not least; a reason to be reckoned with.

3.) It's not a problem at all; it's  an Absolute:

Meaning there  is no "solution". Its the way it is, nothing can change it. I'm not quick to put things in the absolute category because it can create a defeatist attitude, becoming a catch-all to every problem that arises.  Its important to be able to recognize the difference. With that said though this must be said: Absolutes do exist. If there wasn't there would be no "Serenity Prayer." Even with absolutes there are still options: Accept it is one option. Or reject it completely.  This meaning dismiss it, never to be revisited again. I'm not quick to do the latter either. If you're quickly dismissive you may overlook something. 

I feel all problems and absolutes bare scrutiny and analysis, to decide which they are and which road to take.  Scrutiny and analysis mean nothing though, if it's not in a solution oriented manner. So when facing a problem remember these idioms:

"Every cause has and effect."

"For every action there is a reaction." 

"Don't cry over spilled milk."

"For every problem there is a solution."

"There's more than one way to skin a cat."

And

"Some things are absolute."

Depression The Silent Slayer

Depression

The Silent Slayer

Ever had a gloomy day? Has that gloomy day lasted for a week? Do you feel like nothing will improve? Are you embarrassed to admit those things aloud? Join the club. In 2012 it was reported about 350 million, 5% of the earth’s population, suffer from depression. If you’re just now thinking to yourself “That’s not much compared to the 7 billion people living on earth.” You could say that but picture each person with the value of $1 in your bank account? Still sneezing at it? The value of 1 life is worth so much more.

Depression is a disease, like diabetes or cancer, it can infect healthy ways of living and erode even the very will to live. So how can we snap out of it? Here are a few tips that you can try or suggest to a loved one suffering from depression.

1.       Talk to someone

More people love you than you probably know, and are completely willing to do what they can to assist you. However, if you feel that’s not the truth then talk to a professional. They can help you figure out just where the depression stems from and offer you a fresh perspective. Is money an issue? There are some state funded agencies that have grants for those who can’t afford the type of treatment you may require. Check your local agencies to see what’s available.

2.       Take something to feel better

If medication prescribed by a doctor is not an option or not your thing (some side-effects being as undesirable as what it may be treating) then look for herbal remedies. Go to your local herbal store, a brick and mortar store like GNC or Whole Foods but if you just can’t get out of the door or out the bed take whatever medium you are using now to read this article and search online for reputable herbal companies, i.e. Nature’s Way, Irwin Naturals. Search for herbs to improve your mood and outlook (St. Johns Wart, Sunny Mood). Do your research though, some of these herbs don’t interact well with other mental health and wellness drugs so be informed.

3.       Take care of your body

Physical activity can do leaps and bounds for your mental health. It doesn’t have to be rigorous or strenuous. Small things a walk in the park, a jog around the block, go fishing. Just get active the more you are moving and taking in your surroundings the less apt you are to fixate and obsess over what’s not perfect in your life. A part of taking care of your health includes what you take in for food, so watch what you eat. Little by little make positive changes in your daily diet.

4.       Find an outlet

Not just any outlet! Healthy and responsible ones. What’s that thing you used to love to do and could do all day long?? Yeah! Do that even if it’s just for 5-10 minutes. OH no you don’t enjoy it anymore. It happens don’t fret. Try something new, language, reading materials, challenge your brain, paint, take pictures, write a poem, write a short story or how about learn a new dance! Lord knows there’s no shortage of those on You Tube. The point is don’t just sit idle. It’s very dangerous.

5.       Don’t underestimate the power of prayer

Sometimes 1-4 just can’t cut it because you can’t take that first step to even try. If you find yourself unable to, drop everything and have a conversation with the Creator. Not a memorized and recited prayer. Pour out the depths of your soul. Tell him your troubles if you can pinpoint them, If not ask him to read your heart and mind. Request that He impart His Holy Spirit and watch almost instantly you will have a measure of strength. What if you don’t know what eactly to say? There are literally hundreds of prayers in the Bible. Read it. Until you can find the words borrow theirs. After all He is the God of Comfort.

The Body and mind are a Temple. A Temple unkempt and uncared for eventually becomes a ruin. Don’t ruin your Temple.