Truth of the Heart

​I’m embarrassed to love you so unselfishly, so shamelessly so very aimlessly. For there lies not a future, not a home for my love, not a rest for my weary heart, overwrought from loving you.

 Overwrought from giving you every ounce of me inside…dying to be with you on the outside. Incessantly outside your reach. Can’t reach your heart. Can’t reach you by phone. Can’t be in your presence… Someone else calls you home. Alone I roam covered in love reserved for only you.

 So embarrassing, because it’s nothing, all my heart and soul, absolutely nothing does it mean to you. I’m ashamed that I’ve carried on, parched, thirsting, for my life my love, untamed yet chained …my flame remains unchanged and you unfazed by my love or my pain, the situation unchanged. I’ve nothing left to lose and at this point nothing either to gain. 

I must be insane for loving you so unrestrained without reward … without a hint of a promise in store… without hope for a future… for being in love on my own…waiting for you but to you I’m not home…

Embarrassed and Ashamed 

Attached and unclaimed 

Delusional, deranged 

Crazy in love

A Flame- Winters Dream

​I was set to battle an internet star who lived in an underground multi layered mansion. She was deranged, smiling, donning medieval style dress. A high collar with a powdered white face and long red hair. Curls galore. 

When the battle ensued, holding her 8 post candelabra with fresh candles lit, she attempted to bait me to chase her further into the lair and higher into the suites of the Mansion. As she donned a mad hatters deranged eyes and empty smile the tips of her hair caught a blaze . Her flight fanned the flames and ignited the artwork in the halls, the furniture, the suites themselves,  her taunting was her own undoing and all in her lair.

It's Time

Wrap Up 2022

Here comes 2023.

Here I stand with a complete and whole heart?

How can that be?

2022 Certainly tried it's best to undo me.

I came in with my heart broken in Half.

Cut ties with some decade old Friends 
Cut ties with some lifelong Kin...   

A farewell to a Fiancé months before nuptials.

 
I haven't included any trials and test but add them too and long before June.... My heart should've been in many more pieces than 2.

But what have we got here???

I feel renewed
I am at Peace
I am Serene

Happiness suits me despite trials...

 I wear a smile despite my test & YES I know the best is yet to come.
Joy is a constant even when things go wrong, 

&

I realized I needed all of this to make me stronger.

Strength, I have but not alone. I couldn't have done any of this on my own.

Thank God,

 without His guidance...

 I would have been just where the enemy wanted me... broken in 2022.

Here comes 2023.
Here I stand with a complete and whole heart.

Fully Armored
&
Ready for the next chapter to start.

Enduring Energies

The most powerful, meaningful and enduring  energies known to all life forms CAN be placed into action; maybe even materialized   … HOWEVER they ARE NOT material things but are at first unseen. Evidence of their invisible existence surrounds us, engulfs us even, every day:

Thoughts & Ideas 

Emotions

Vibes/Energy/Auras

Sound: Music / Nature/ Familiar or unfamiliar voices  etc 

Wind

Faith

The Spirit Realm 

The Almighty Sovereign Himself

We can\"t physically touch ANYTHING in that short incomplete list in this material World but ALL the things on that list CAN TOUCH YOU.

Can you think of anything to add to the list? Comment below

Peace & Blessings 

LIVE LOVE & TRAVEL

-Vannique 

AKA

LOTUS ESO

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AMORE SANTANA

We always knew #SHE was a #beauty. It was never her looks... though anyone with eyes would never deny that either

RATHER

It was her soul... her #heart seemed to be somehow even able to taste #sweet as the inside of a  #honeysuckle yet its consistency  is #Solid made of #Gold. 

We know #Him... never been guilty in life but shrouded by shame

Shrouded by hurt never able to show pain

Hated, rejected, feared, disrespected,cast aside, castaway, locked away in a cage. 

We know #Him..post battle Warrior still fighting an unholy, ungodly, and unjust War...a war fought prior to even his very conception...TRAPPED IN GOD\"S HONORARY BLESSING AND NATURAL PROTECTION. 

God saw fit

To fit together

The two of you

A Beautiful Queen

A Warrior King

LOVE IS NOT A DREAM

Under the Sun

 

Blisters on my Feet

I almost Passed out in

that heat 

That Sun

up high

Shining...

don't always 

equal smile

It can beat down on your 

head if you're walking 

on miles 

 I learned to smile in the

rain. Deepened the

divots of  my dimples.

Widened the ripples playing in puddles.

Dodged the falls...

and pivoted

It's going to rain anyway...

That feels way better than my tired feet & back

Skin like hot leather under that bright sun that

DRAINED MY SOUL

TIL I HAD REACHED 

MY DESTINATION

THE SUN HAD NOT SET

BUT IT HAD SET ME DOWN

 

I tried to Smile

Blisters on my Feet

Sweat on my Brow

Hand Blistered & Bitten

I almost Passed Out in the Heat

Under the Sun.

Vannique

 TY Mr.Patron

 

Filthy Flirt

Pictures don't do you justice

And I can't touch this 

cause you say you're in love

but please trust this

if you ever uncuff 

just know 

I can't be everything 

but I'll certainly be enough

an I'll give you the sky and the moon and let you touch it 

I'll get them both dipped in platinum 

Plus diamond crusted

And even on days where you look busted

I'm still gonna buss it

Damn........ look at me hella crushing

And it's almost a better view to look at you

Wheeew

Knocked me right out my shoes

The moment I saw you

I know I'm not wrong ...

You felt the vibe too

Your eyes locked mine At times 

in fact 

quite a few..

What it do???

Oh that's right .no can do

Cause you say you're in love

But I say pull up

And stay till sun up

And fuck me till sunset

But you not ready for that yet..

Let me behave

I'll never get in love way...

But if you drop that bitch tonight ... Call me tomorrow 

K?