It's Time

Wrap Up 2022

Here comes 2023.

Here I stand with a complete and whole heart?

How can that be?

2022 Certainly tried it's best to undo me.

I came in with my heart broken in Half.

Cut ties with some decade old Friends 
Cut ties with some lifelong Kin...   

A farewell to a Fiancé months before nuptials.

 
I haven't included any trials and test but add them too and long before June.... My heart should've been in many more pieces than 2.

But what have we got here???

I feel renewed
I am at Peace
I am Serene

Happiness suits me despite trials...

 I wear a smile despite my test & YES I know the best is yet to come.
Joy is a constant even when things go wrong, 

&

I realized I needed all of this to make me stronger.

Strength, I have but not alone. I couldn't have done any of this on my own.

Thank God,

 without His guidance...

 I would have been just where the enemy wanted me... broken in 2022.

Here comes 2023.
Here I stand with a complete and whole heart.

Fully Armored
&
Ready for the next chapter to start.

Rescinded Invitation

You were there in your decadence.

The opposite of Heaven sent,

you embody and personify maleficent.

Far away from the benevolent

In shock I took you in my eyes. 

Wondering how you arrived.

You took me in 
with your colored glimmers 

& 

Smiled donning the teeth 
I'll always remember 

& 

once admired so dearly. 

I was surprised by you... 
as you were uninvited. 

But unlike then 

I knew 

 I was not safe with you. 

"Leave" 
is what I demanded! 

Then to my front door 
I escorted my old heart. 

Once you stepped out the door

it closed. 

The White Door began to bleed out 

Scarlet and Crimson.

Goodbye

Power of Peace

When you make positive changes in your life...and turn your face completely toward God 2 things for sure will happen:

1. God will bless and protect you.

&

2. Satan will send hater to try and remind you of what you came from.

Perhaps you can view it like this: "Wow, I've come a mighty long way with God's help!"

Here's a tip: Care not what people say...only care how God feels. (1Cor 6:9-11)

If you're moving forward in the right direction... just keep it pushing. Let the haters live in your past but don't join them...and don't involve them in your future👍Make room for the peace in your life that you've been granted. 

Peace 

Blessings

&

Agape

The Iron Necklace

I'd come to this place of the past a visitor. Happy to have traveled back, honored by the experience. Not knowing the taste would leave me full. At the start a man of fame caught my eye. When passing I requested his autograph. He sensed I was from a different time.. that my dignity was in tact. He winced at my request... grimaced at my skin...wrote his name on the thin piece of paper; I smiled. Seeing my smile the man of fame tore the paper in two threw it to the ground spit on it and said: "I don't care about you." 

I opened my mouth and sharply told him that he meant nothing to me. I wanted to tell him that his hate was foolish, unfounded and ignorant but before my tongue lashed my tour guide grabbed my arm pulling me away; begging my pardon. As quickly as it happened was as quickly as I forgot it. But the past would not. "We must leave this town quickly" my guide says "get you someplace safe." 

 At the local market beside the building there were trucks all the drivers leaving soon. I boarded a truck with a man named Irie, who never spoke to me, only my guide asking: "Where are you headed?" "To the gym" my guide announced. The road offered no scenery. Just streets surrounded by blank white space as an empty page. 

I entered the gym firstly teeming with life a ball game in progress. Food offered at the door I accepted my delicious tomato and cheese sandwiches wrapped in wax paper with picnic patterns. Holding my sandwich I was asked to play the game as 1 team was short a person. I didn't have time  to officially accept as the ball was passed to me at the same time the question was posed. I caught the ball that smashed my sandwich but carefree I shot my jumper. As I came down from the air I brought down all the smiles in the room or so I thought. Smiling social faces were now silent, broken spirits with eyes full of fear. Every single body moved from the court  Every head bowed down eyes to the ground.  I sensed danger not looking around to lay eyes on it, I sought cover behind a tall curtain of a window in the gym. Through the curtain I could see two figures walking toward me. One with brown skin and poor mans clothing holding what looked like a medieval style helmet but there was nothing where the head should be. Just a neck piece of iron with a crank on the outside. The other a man white of skin in regal bright purple gold and blue cloth and the shoes of a Jester. Wearing a face that showed repugnance for all his eyes could see. His name was known as Justice.  I took a bite of my smashed sandwich and watched as Justice motioned for his hound man to pull back the curtain. As the curtain pulled back the smile of the brown hound man widened...a face like that of a shark. Teeth small and sharp... eyes that darkened and widened ... a shark who had just smelled blood. Frozen paralyzed with fear... simultaneously curious: "What do you want with me?!" The whole room gasp at my outspoken spirit. Justice didn't flinch. The brown man began to pant like a dog excited. "3 minutes." the Justice said while holding up 3 fingers. The brown hound man took the neck piece and placed it over my head and around my neck it went. Neck stiff I looked for my guide, with only my eyes, who was now gone. The brown hound man cranked the handle slowly and the length of the neck piece elongated stretching my neck. My chin from my shoulders further and further. Until it became almost impossible to speak. My tongue lodged between my teeth. Forced biting down I could taste my own blood. Jaws forced closed I moaned loudly in pain. Justice motioned to the brown man to stop cranking. "Do you have something to say?" Asked Justice. I couldn't speak ... I couldn't nod my head. I tapped the Iron Necklace. Justice standing with crossed legs and hands behind his back, a stoic countenance, lifted 1 hand to motion to unwind the crank just a little so I may speak.

"You've got the wrong person... I'm a visitor to this time. I committed no crimes." 

"Did you not offend a man of fame today near the market?"... looking down at his watch he declared: "2 minutes" with 2 fingers in the air and motioned for his hound man to crank the necklace to induce pain. I felt as if this time he just continued to crank. I could feel my head separating from off my body. The pain was unbearable I lost consciousness. 

I woke in a line. In clothes that weren't mine. Being yelled at to rise and enter the coop. Slave quarters. When I entered my consciousness separated from my body. I was now watching as they took her into her small room covered in feathers and hay with barbed chicken wire as the only walls and doors. She who was once I found a full plate of delicious food placed on a ledge for consumption: Mashed potatoes, yams and a savory meat. She who was once I ate her fill as she spoke openly of the strength instilled in her by her mother. A green bottle of sweet wine she who was once I began to drink. The consciousness knew that wine was not to be drank to enjoy with dinner but to soothe the pain after whippings. She who was once I was clueless. The wine made she who was once I jovial enough to sing. The pain it would soon bring. In the hallway of the large coop a fat black mistress watched on hating every note. She removed her whip from her holder and cracked it. Vowing to break my spirit. She asked if she who was once I thought of myself as "Special?...I'll fix that." she declared! She marched off to prepare my whipping post. She who was once me was careless...careless and drunk. But 2 small men raised in the coop, that stunted their growth, emerged from around the corner of the coop hall speaking of the mistress one said: "The whipping isn't over until she's done." The other said: "And shes not done until she sleeps."

Souls Windows

Her truth

cannot be contained. 
She tries to refrain

her eyes 

though beautiful

tell all her pains.
They examine, search and find.

Shaped for almonds.
As diamonds they shine.

Her tears

carry her fears.

Tasting of salt.
Her eyes 
when satisfied 
dance The Waltz.
Danger in a glare.
Piercing thick layers.
Imagination in a gaze.
Intricate is the maze.

Intimate are the whites

that carry her light. 

It has yet to dim.

Her lashes

encompass her laughter

& passion. 

Her eyelids

conceal her lust

& guard her heart. A must.

The same eyes 

from her youth til now.

Despite the continuous fight

& troublesome nights
They have not grown weary

They still flicker 

filled with glitter.
How they wonder.

Her eyes speak volumes over her voice.

Finance or Fetters

Unlimited Money or Freedom

You pick!

One is an illusion.

One is Elusive.

Which one is guaranteed?

Which one is backed?

Which one is Tangible?

Where's the confusion???

To have all the money you need makes you free? 

Is this true?

Or do the wealthy feel confined as you? 

To be free as a post civil war slave; I'd suppose...what a change but still aren't some trapped in a figurative cage?

What of those who wish to be freed from real steel bars and locks? Would they exchange their pains? Would they loosen their chains if they knew they'd struggle for nickels dimes pennies quarters change? 

What of the "free" would they risk "freedom" to attain "wealth"

Many actually have...is money bad for your health?

Is freedom real or Ideal?

Have any of us experienced the real deal?

Is wealth real or longterm?

Is money actually just printed paper ...a virus and germ?

If you had to pick one in exchange for the other which would you choose???

Which is elusive?

Which is an ideal?

Which means more to you?

Which is an illusion?

Which has no backing?

What's your conclusion?

Peace & Blessings 

Vannique

Dark Chocolate Dream

Bittersweet in my belly

Haunted by your face in dreams

I drew away knowing
 even there you're no good for me
Used by a passing spirit
"You're coming through often"
was all Blue said
or so I was told.

Shadows of tethered ships

Unrecognizable after heavy storms

Battered from weather

Thick handwritten letters 

from strangers on one side

The pages lost

  my heart torn open

Open and close
did the
unlocked doors

Who is this in my bed?
Then I found a new place to lay my head

Pictures in my wallet I don't recognize 

Where have I been?

Everything is new

In the mirror 

A smiled is viewed

Bittersweet in my belly

Quell the Rebel

Quell the rebel within

Rain on a roof made of tin

Lullaby it to etermal sleep

Wrap it in peppermint and lavendar linen sheets

Do not dare to weep 

For this is not a loss

not a defeat

Found finally

Unbound to being lost

Absolutely Free of exhaust

The fare paid

The trail laid

Look! Follow the road 

Long ago paved 

Quell the rebel within

Only way to a sure fire win

Peace & Blessings
Vannique

If You're Reading This...

If you're reading this... 

Then you've made it to 2019!

Congratulations.

Many of those whom we love didn't have the privilege.

SIDENOTE: Is it me... or doesn't it seem that at the end of every year there's a rash of people who "check out" of the "Hotel California"?

But if you're reading this... then you've been blessed with more time.

So, what do you plan to do with the time you've been given?

Social media takes a seriously cynical approach to: Clearing negative energy, seeking to get closer to God, resolving to eat better, live better, exercise more or be more productive.

I know you see the sarcastic memes. Now I'm not promoting New Years Resolutions. I'm promoting positive resolutions at any time of the year.  I'm saying if you want to clear negativity do it. If you want to get closer to the creator then do it! And so on. You've been given more time to improve matters in your life. To mend fences, to make all sorts of progress. Don't listen to social media as it continues to engineer our thoughts and trivialize positive change. It could be that they don't want you to get productive and positive. That would mean less time scrolling, clicking and buying from them. You can do it! Whatever you have set your mind to: It is Beyond Possible. It is tangible! I say start with the time you've been given today and GO FOR IT! Whatever it is that is truly positive!

Peace & Blessings
Vannique

The Wrapup 2018

Pardon my French but...." Quelle putain d'année?!"

 

Like a speeding bullet, it flew by didn't it? And true to the nature of a speeding bullet, to be honest, all I can remember is the painful moments. In my subconscious they far outweighed the prideful moments. However, I remain grateful because the cleansing that resulted from this is phenomenal. Not only the cleansing but the internal reckoning of power, purpose and passion, within myself is incomparable and priceless. I would go through all those trials again in a millisecond to be in the constant state of self awareness that I am blessed to carry into 2019.

The Uncovering

For some reason, in this year it was revealed to me the innate nature of all those I adored. I was surprised to find most of the people I placed a high value upon were well below undeserving.  It felt as if I was at a soiree, draped in my finest attire, smelling of frankincense, myrrh, and lavender. My face painted by the illustrious Sir Prater of Mac Cosmetics. My glass full to the brim with the sweetest of Sangria, my heart full of good intentions, my head inflated with positivity and pure intentions carrying me high above the headwinds and into the thickest of clouds. Then "Down goes Frazier!" I came crashing when it was realized everyone else in attendance with me was in a costume.  There were wolves dressed as sheep, clowns dressed as confidants, assassins clothed in a lovers garb , foes draped with the cloak of family. So never mind what I was wearing! I may as well had been buck naked. The taste of my Sangria soured and my deflated head sent me spiraling back to the earth just as I was halfway to heaven. I came to the realization that baring your soul genuinely is the opposite of freedom in the wrong hands. I was awakened to the fact that I had held in esteem the very hands of those who: reviled in my captivity, who coveted my security and sought to sully my sincerity and tarnish it with either their jaded view of life or jaded view of me.  But not all who launched assault were jaded some knew my nature to be true, and saw me as a target to aim their missles and went on offense. Perhaps a light in me shined too bright for their eyes. Who really knows? I've resigned to not try and figure these ones out. Enough energy has been wasted on them well outside"why and what for." Action was required.

The Separating Shield

Costumes forsaken, I had been attacked by the wolves and the assassins and berated by the clowns when I readjusted my crown and cleared the court. The late Maya Angelou wrote: "When someone shows you who they are, believe them." The clearing of negative interference left me a bit empty at first. After all these were not strays or people I just adopted and let in. These were family, dear friends and lovers. People that I felt loved me simply because of how much I loved them. Let me be the first and hopefully the last to tell you: That's not how any of this works! Although I believe it should, it just doesn't. It is not a given that because they are family they will do you right. It is not a given that because you are sincere that they will be. It's not a given that because you will give to them your last dime that they would ever give you a red cent. It is not a fact that because you bend backward they will be impressed enough to move a muscle. It is not a given that because they know better they will do better! Do not ever make those assumptions that would be a fatal mistake. I've never been a pessimistic person and these experiences haven't made me one. If I turned my tuner to a pessimistic channel that would mean they all succeeded in stealing my joy. They did not! What they did do though, is held up a large mirror facing me. In this mirror I was able to see clearly that I hadn't been guarding myself with a complete suit of armor. I was leaving my heart completely exposed. They showed me I had forgot to carry my shield.

 The Ship of Thanks

The intent of these attacks were to chisel away at my buoyant spirit; with the hopeful intent to sink my ship. Instead it carved in me a discerning heart free from naivete. It sculpted a healthy consciousness of self completely free from undue or unworthy self sacrificing. It fashioned a form of energy that will not abide the slighting and cannot tolerate insincerity.

 In short those chisels have created a ship that is sailing into 2019. Yes, Kings and Queens this vessel is sailing into the New Year with no heavy (in every sense of the word) cargo.  And for that I'm grateful! My advice: Look at your vessel is there any cargo weighting you down? I know you may have loaded the cargo for the longhaul but it could be doing more damage on your voyage then it will ever do good once you reach your new fertile ground. Throw it overboard and let it sink to the floor of the sea! True to myself, I was able to find the silver lining and learn from pain. Now I can truly say looking forward with a new pair of glasses... my future looks very bright. 

Sail On
Peace and Blessings
Vannique

Friends or Nah

I watched this video today you may have seen, it recently went viral. I laughed 😂 so hard. In the video a teen is harrasing an older man whose homeless.  The teens "friends" egg on the teenager while filming to keep up the harrassment.

Lets just say this kid got what was coming to him... I didn't laugh because a teen was being disrespectful to a 1.Elder 2. Someone less fortunate.
I didnt laugh cause he was he got what was coming to him... Well i did laugh at that part too but that wasn't what got me... The most comedic part to me was the comments and reactions of this teens so called "friends". 

Sadly this teen was spineless and  a follower...not really the "friends" who were videoing/instigating.

I laughed hard till it wasn't funny. But I wondered why / or how he could trust people who CLEARLY steer him in the wrong direction for their own entertainment.

Some of my friends are probably thinking "hold the phone we know you've done some F$%KED UP Stuff to your friends for a laugh."  True but never with malicious intent or anything dangerous or radical. Or some of you may say " I know you've hurt someone..." My answer to that is your right.  I don't claim to be perfect. Like any human I've done things I'm not proud of but... in my heart if your my friend... Ill travel the 7 seas for our friendship & I'll never put you in harms way.

I actually found myself feeling sorry for this kid cause he's blind to the fact that the people he considers "friends" couldn't care less about his welfare.

What about you? Do the people you rock with... Rock with you??? Can you trust them??? Do you trust them??? (Take time to note those are two very different questions.) Do they have your best interest at heart? Do they steer you in a direction positive for your life, health, wellbeing and future. If you esteem the friendship. Do they hold it in the same regard? If not why continue to subject yourself to such treachery? Ohhh you don't want to be alone??????
Take that and forget it.

Follow a path all your own and it will lead you to like- minds, like-hearts and hopefully less drama.

THINK... about your circle who you allow in it, who you tell your innermost thoughts, who you break bread with, who breaks bread with you? All answers are really visible.. If you look / watch/study/wait/ you'll see.

Don't forget to trust your senses too sometimes, outwardly "friends" play "all the right cards" but inwardly you know they are somehow "cheating." It happens!

All that to say the company you keep makes or breaks you... So be cautious who enters... Be cautious who exits.. And don't be afraid to make changes to it. Sadly all friendships don't last forever.. Some do but all don't. This life we've been given is not to surround yourself by people who: could do without you, could use you, could lie on you, could lie to you, set you up, tear you down or think anything less than the world of you.  If you stayed around them you in essesnce do to yourself what they do. So free yourself because peace is priceless.

Back to the video if it wasn't enough that they set him up... And left him All THE WAY  hanging.... They posted it online.... JEEZUZ... CHECK IT OUT 👇 & share this article if u dig it!
http://m.worldstarhiphop.com/android/video.php?v=wshh9955oKR190087v32

Depression The Silent Slayer

Depression

The Silent Slayer

Ever had a gloomy day? Has that gloomy day lasted for a week? Do you feel like nothing will improve? Are you embarrassed to admit those things aloud? Join the club. In 2012 it was reported about 350 million, 5% of the earth’s population, suffer from depression. If you’re just now thinking to yourself “That’s not much compared to the 7 billion people living on earth.” You could say that but picture each person with the value of $1 in your bank account? Still sneezing at it? The value of 1 life is worth so much more.

Depression is a disease, like diabetes or cancer, it can infect healthy ways of living and erode even the very will to live. So how can we snap out of it? Here are a few tips that you can try or suggest to a loved one suffering from depression.

1.       Talk to someone

More people love you than you probably know, and are completely willing to do what they can to assist you. However, if you feel that’s not the truth then talk to a professional. They can help you figure out just where the depression stems from and offer you a fresh perspective. Is money an issue? There are some state funded agencies that have grants for those who can’t afford the type of treatment you may require. Check your local agencies to see what’s available.

2.       Take something to feel better

If medication prescribed by a doctor is not an option or not your thing (some side-effects being as undesirable as what it may be treating) then look for herbal remedies. Go to your local herbal store, a brick and mortar store like GNC or Whole Foods but if you just can’t get out of the door or out the bed take whatever medium you are using now to read this article and search online for reputable herbal companies, i.e. Nature’s Way, Irwin Naturals. Search for herbs to improve your mood and outlook (St. Johns Wart, Sunny Mood). Do your research though, some of these herbs don’t interact well with other mental health and wellness drugs so be informed.

3.       Take care of your body

Physical activity can do leaps and bounds for your mental health. It doesn’t have to be rigorous or strenuous. Small things a walk in the park, a jog around the block, go fishing. Just get active the more you are moving and taking in your surroundings the less apt you are to fixate and obsess over what’s not perfect in your life. A part of taking care of your health includes what you take in for food, so watch what you eat. Little by little make positive changes in your daily diet.

4.       Find an outlet

Not just any outlet! Healthy and responsible ones. What’s that thing you used to love to do and could do all day long?? Yeah! Do that even if it’s just for 5-10 minutes. OH no you don’t enjoy it anymore. It happens don’t fret. Try something new, language, reading materials, challenge your brain, paint, take pictures, write a poem, write a short story or how about learn a new dance! Lord knows there’s no shortage of those on You Tube. The point is don’t just sit idle. It’s very dangerous.

5.       Don’t underestimate the power of prayer

Sometimes 1-4 just can’t cut it because you can’t take that first step to even try. If you find yourself unable to, drop everything and have a conversation with the Creator. Not a memorized and recited prayer. Pour out the depths of your soul. Tell him your troubles if you can pinpoint them, If not ask him to read your heart and mind. Request that He impart His Holy Spirit and watch almost instantly you will have a measure of strength. What if you don’t know what eactly to say? There are literally hundreds of prayers in the Bible. Read it. Until you can find the words borrow theirs. After all He is the God of Comfort.

The Body and mind are a Temple. A Temple unkempt and uncared for eventually becomes a ruin. Don’t ruin your Temple.